People Say That You'll Die Faster Than Without Water. But We Know It's Just A Lie To Scare Your Sons. To Scare Your Daughters.

So I broke it off with Dan. It was the easiest thing that I've ever done. It couldn't have gone easier! I am so happy right now I can't even believe it. He was just like... "You don't think we should see each other anymore?" and then he was like "I understand." That was that. He understands. Far easier than my break up with Jeff.
So Ethan and I decided not to have sex anymore. I know know know that it's for the best but I'm still a little bit sad about it. Not even the sex really I just like being close to him and kissing him and I liked when he randomly spent the night. I don't know how much that will happen now and it makes me sad. The night at Allie's was so wonderful, even though there was crying and a scary incident that I'm still not too sure about. It was good though. Her party was so much fun and the second Ethan kissed me when we woke up the next morning, I knew my stupid imagination was playing tricks on me and I remembered that he does still love me. Thank god, haha. But that incident. Yeah.... I guess we'll see.

The City Lights Just Blur.

Even when we were dating, things I wanted only ever happened when they were convenient for him. I guess tonight I just really needed him to be here for me. And now I've lost all interest in going to Michael's. woohoo.

Voices Calling From A Yellow Road. To Come Downstairs And Say Hello.

I've been stuck inside since 5:30 doing nothing. I cleaned and put new clothes away and that's about it. I've been fucking around on the internet for the rest of the time. It's kinda nice, having nothing to do, but it's kinda boring too. Dillon's going to some barbeque and he invited me to go too but I don't really want to. I don't know if I mentioned that I realized that I don't like going to those sorts of things as much anymore because when I went to Cassie's before I left for Disneyland, I realized that I can hear about Ethan flirting or whatever with other girls but I can't stomach seeing it. I'm sure he'd be the same way. Just like I'm sure he'd hate to hear about Dan. But I dunno, I like Dan. He's a just a big goofball. I mean, I don't REALLY like him, I just... I dunno, he likes me. So I guess that's it. He really wants to spend a lot of time with me and I like that. And he's a fun guy. So right now, that's that.

I don't have to work tomorrow though. I kind of hoped Ethan would stop by because I really love when he randomly spends the night. For now though, I am off to fuck around some more. God I'm bored. galernvaihnknakdalkghnify.

This Is The Story With The Fantastic Lies.

Haven't updated lately. Nothing really to say except that I went to Disneyland and came back with new weird feelings about my father. I found out that he cheated on my mom multiple times while they were together. It was a big part in their divorce. It's just weird because I never pictured my dad as someone who would do that. He seems so innocent to that sort of thing but now that my mom mentions it, it makes sense. I knew I hated cheating for some reason. If my husband ever cheated on me like that, I wouldn't stick around to see what happens. If you do it once, who says you won't do it again, right? It just makes me feel a little sick. I don't really want to see my dad now but I know I have to because I love him and it's not that I'm pissed off at him, I'm just very very disappointed. I wonder if he cheats on Julie Cooper? I wonder if he cheated on my mom with Julie?
On a lighter note, last night was really nice. I've been having those types of nights a lot lately. It's great, I love it. Too bad that I've had to get up and leave hella early on every single one. I want to do that now. I think I'll go lay in my bed...