Come Back To Bed.

I miss Ethan sooooo much. It's terrible. If I'm not keeping myself busy and hanging out with people or doing stuff then I get really sad. It's pathetic in a way but I just miss him so much. It's been like 3 days! I still have over two weeks! I feel awful because I've asked him (crying) to come home like since the day he left and I shouldn't because it's so completely selfish and he says he wishes he could but I know he's having fun. And he should. It's an amazing experience not matter how hot it is in Texas.
I just wish I could have gone! I really really wanted to go and because I'm the only other worker at the store, I can't. It kinda sucks in that way. I was looking so forward to it. But I just wish he was here. I don't want him to leave me anymore. I'm not ready for it or something. I just recently started getting over how hurt and horrible last summer was for me. I seriously am getting over it. Ever since I actually got to express my feelings about it, I've felt a million times better. I just feel ready to move on from it. But I didn't want him to leave. I'm afraid of him dying or something. I don't want to have to speak at his funeral. I don't know if I could. I know that must be ridiculous but I have no rational feelings. I just want him to come home and skip his tour and be here. I don't like my big room all to myself. It's big and lonely and scary and I'm sad when I go to sleep.
I don't know what else to say except I want him home. So bad. I hate Texas. Come home.
.Stephanie.